Instead, the center of our parenting strategy should revolve around helping our children grow up to be mentally healthy and strong. Having this type of resiliency will allow them go out to the world and start chasing big dreams on their own.
Here are 6 rules that will help you do it.
When your child has an issue, it's natural to feel the urge to solve it for her. Unfortunately, this deprives her of learning the basic skills in problem solving. Next time, resist the temptation to "fix" things. Instead, try following this strategy:
No matter how big or small, the lessons learned from navigating your own problems will carry through to adulthood.
Discipline is crucial when it comes to raising a healthy, responsible child. However, it’s not to be mistaken for punishment and brutal strictness. It’s important for every parent to distinguish between things which do and don’t deserve a punishment.
Making mistakes is the natural way of learning and experimenting with new things, which is why you shouldn’t scold your child for each mistake they make. Instead of being angry or yelling endlessly, you should:
If you punish your child for every little mistake she makes, she’ll be afraid to take action, experiment, and explore.
Suppressing negative emotions such as fear, anxiety, or sadness can be devastating for a person’s mental health and can lead to further problems such as depression. Your child needs to learn what to do when negative emotions take over and how to deal with them.
It’s your job to teach them by setting an example. Make it a family practice and stick to it:
Just talking about negative emotions is one way to get them out of your system, deal with them, or process them. Teach your child it’s important to be open about emotions and not keep anything within.
It’s important to teach your kids how to take control of their lives from the earliest age. Just as you shouldn’t jump to solve every single tiny problem she has, you shouldn’t be performing her daily activities for her.
Start out by teaching her to:
Baby steps. Over time, make sure they are ready for some more responsibility and more complex daily activities, such as:
In this way, you'll be teaching your child to be independent, responsible, and capable as an adult.
Your child is the center of your universe and the most beloved being in your entire life. You want to give them all the love you can, and that’s beautiful. However, you need to find the fine line between giving them love and giving them everything they want.
Teaching humility is tricky, but if you want your child to be a mentally strong and good person, you need to find a way to do it.
Here’s what to think about:
Finally, it’s important that we remind ourselves our children are just children.
Many parents take things too far by giving their kids too much power in the family’s decision making. Remember that you’re in charge, and sometimes, your child isn’t supposed to have a say in things.
For example, it’s ok to ask your child:
It’s not ok to ask a question such as:
Setting these boundaries will teach them to respect others and know what their place is.
It takes a lot of effort, positive energy, and meaningful conversations to raise a mentally healthy and strong child. In addition, there’s one thing to always keep in mind. You are their role model—so practice what you preach.
Daniela McVicker is a psychologist and family counselor. She is also a freelance writer and a contributor to TopWritersReview. Her passion is writing about leading a healthy family life and helping people enjoy their lives to the fullest.